I once asked Alma, "Why do you keep your eyes closed during sex?" "Because," she answered, "I just don't want to see any man enjoying himself!" Alma was funny, sexy, and adventurous, so when she phoned and said she was coming from New Jersey for a taste of Florida (and me), I was excited. I knew just where I wanted to take her. I was going to take her to my favorite Orlando attraction! Every time I walk into this place, excitement flows through me like an electric shock, and I could spend hours just walking about taking in the thrilling sights. No, I don't mean Magic Kingdom or Universal. The most exciting attraction in Orlando can be found on OBT--the Fairvilla Mega Store for Lovers! Fairvilla opened in 1992 and soon became the largest sex store in the nation! It's not the usual sex store one finds in some dark section of a large city that has sleazy-looking customers. No, Fairvilla is a large, bright, colorful world of exotic pleasure paraphernalia, catering to a mostly young, white, upscale, college crowd! When Alma first walked in her eyes lit up. Soft music was playing and on display were colorful lingerie for women, spider-web sheer nighties, fishnet dresses, peek-a-boo bikinis, nude boots, glittering spike heel shoes, and costumes for fantasy love sessions! I tried to talk Alma into buying a French Maid's outfit for later, but she declined! She also passed on the paste-on tats and sex jewelry. "My mom said I could have as many boyfriends as I wanted, but she made me promise no tatoos and no body-piercing bling!" The first floor holds a large collection of porno DVD's--of all descriptions and for all tastes. I wanted to rent "Debbie Does Dallas" but Alma chose a cartoon, "Daffy Does Daisy"! We went to the second floor where sex toys are kept. Toys in all shapes, sizes, colors--toys made of glass, rubber, cyberskin ("feels like the real thing!"), plastic or jelly. "I'm going to change my Pocket Rocket for something more modern," said Alma. A knowledgeable , female clerk helped her choose a purple, hand-held vibrator.While Alma was checking out the vibrators, I was busy copying a year's supply of sex jokes from the "cards for all occasions," the x-rated T-shirts, and the buttons with naughty sayings. "SEX IS NOBODY'S BUSINESS BUT THE THREE PEOPLE INVOLVED! SEX IS NOT THE ANSWER. SEX IS THE QUESTION. THE ANSWER IS "YES"! SHE WAS TALKING DIRTY WHILE I MADE LOVE TO HER--SO I TOOK AWAY HER CELL PHONE! Viva Fairvilla!
